#Charity

Christ-centered Christmas Advent Activities

/ srabbott2 / 2 Comments

Last year as we were coming into the Christmas season I had a few strong impressions from the spirit which lead to some resolutions.  One that I needed to be a more deliberate mother, that we needed more structure in our lives.  The other that I needed to focus on keeping this holiday about Christ.  With absolutely no deliberate action on my part, my children will learn about Santa.  Santa is everywhere.  Shows, decorations, songs, EVERYWHERE.  Let me be clear that I am by no means anti-Santa, and he does visit our house.  BUT, because everywhere else we get inundated with Santa and commercialization, I felt very strongly that I needed to come up with meaningful and fun activities to make sure my kids understand that this holiday is about Jesus.

If you look at my Thanksgiving advent post I explain a little bit of how I put together these activities.  But for a quick recap, I keep it simple, there’s candy involved, and I use dollar store muffin tins with circles of construction paper to make the calendar.  I don’t have December’s put together yet, but here’s a picture of November’s for reference- just imagine red and green paper instead.IMG_20161031_151857448

Some of my activities are based on the #LightTheWorld campaign from mormon.org, but I struggled to come up with activities for a 3 year old and 1 year old that fit with each scripture.  I also did not go in the order of their calendar at all just because certain activities would work better for us on different days of the week.

You’ll notice that I included a day to celebrate Hannukah, I did this for a few reasons:

  1.  One of my very best friends is Jewish and she has inspired me to want to teach my children to love and respect other cultures.  Also she’ll be visiting right after Hannukah ends, so we’ll get together and have a belated Hannukah bash!
  2. My thought for that day is that we believe in a God of miracles.  The story of Hannukah contains a beautiful miracle and it’s fairly simple for children to understand.
  3. I want my children to understand that God loves and gives miracles to EVERYONE, even those that believe differently than we do.

In addition to the activities listed below we also have Nativity picture books, one from Usborne and the others I think I just grabbed from Toys R Us, and I found some Nativity printables on Pinterest and turned them into magnets for the magnet board in the play room.

I don’t have all the dates set in stone, but here’s my list of thoughts and activities.  Activities based on Light the World have a little star.

  1. Jesus created the world and all of nature.  Decorate the Tree.
  2. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad.* Attend the Southwest Family Christmas Party (my mother in law works for Southwest and you should all be jealous because their family party is so much fun!  But I felt like this Light the World activity should definitely be matched up with a party, so if you already have a holiday party to attend, just pair it with this scripture!)
  3. Jesus speaks through His Prophet and Apostles.  Watch the Christmas Devotional.
  4. Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.* Make ornaments to take to neighbors (I’m using foam and felt snowflakes that I got from Target last year because they are super easy and low mess, but substitute whatever craft floats your boat.)
  5. Nativity sticker scene, again, I picked up a pack of stickers last year at Target.
  6. I was in prison and ye visited me.* Take treats to a police station.
  7. Make gingerbread stables for Family Home Evening.
  8. Jesus is the light of the world.  Go to Glendale Glitters. Here’s an example of doing something fun, but still keeping it Christ-centered by linking the lights back to Him.
  9. I was sick and ye visited me.* Take treats to the NICU.  If you want the long story for why we pick the NICU you can read that post here.  Short story, my daughter was in the NICU for 10 days.  We took treats last year, and I plan on continuing the tradition as the kids grow up.  If you want to do a NICU near you just know it’s best to call ahead and you really will just drop the treats off, young children will most likely not be allowed in.  But, being there even for the short time we were, was lonely and stressful, I can’t imagine being there during the holidays, so NICU parents are definitely a group that could use some cheer.  You could pick any group of ailing individuals, visit someone who recently had surgery, etc.
  10. Jesus gave us temples.  Got to the Mesa Temple Lights.
  11. Family Home Evening, movie night with Nativity movies.  Bible Videos-Nativity, Collection of short Christmas videos, Joy to the World
  12. I was naked and ye clothed me.* Drop off donations to Maggie’s Place.
  13. We believe in a God of Miracles.  Tell the Hannukah story, light candles, play dreidels, etc.
  14. Jesus gave us families.  Make ornaments for grandparents.
  15. Visit a Live Nativity.  There’s a few I’m considering but need to figure out some dates.  Here’s some links to help you out.  Walk through Bethlehem, Grace Glendale
  16. Because of Jesus, our family can be together forever.  Make wreaths (circles have no end.)
  17. Ye shall meet together oft.* Go to church.
  18. Make more ornaments for friends and family.
  19. Family Home Evening- Caroling
  20. For I was an hungered and ye gave me meat.* Donate food, either to a food drive or take a meal to someone who is sick, or a refugee family.
  21. Wisemen still seek Him.  Do a wisemen craft.
  22. Jesus was born in a stable with animals around.  Visit a petting zoo.
  23. Go to see The Star in theaters.  We aren’t huge movie goers, and part of me is wondering if I’m crazy to take a 1 year old and a 3 year old to a legit movie theater,  but I feel like it’s important to support this film so that more like it can be made!  Also, my friend’s son is one of the animators so that’s pretty cool!
  24. Bethlehem dinner.  Last year we started this tradition, and it definitely went over my son’s head, and I think he was sick and didn’t eat anyway, but by golly we are going to stick with it.  We’ve decided to do Christmas Eve on our own as just our little family.  For dinner we eat the type of food that was eaten in Bethlehem.  We had lamb with pita bread which I bought from a Middle Eastern market (you should find one, it was a really neat experience).  We had goat cheese, I cheated on this and bought the stuff wrapped in cranberries from Costco, so maybe less authentic, but sooo good.  Then we read the Christmas story and used our Nativity magnets to help act it out, as the kids get older we’ll have them do the acting, but for now we just use the pictures.

Merry Christmas!

You wanna PEACE of me?

/ srabbott2 / 1 Comment

I tried to find a good definition for peace, and the interwebs failed me.  The Google machine did give me what it’s not.  It defined peace as “freedom from disturbance,” or “freedom from or cessation of war or violence.”  Can we really simply define peace by what it’s not?  How will we know what it actually is when we see it?

If peace is merely a lack of violence or disturbance then tell me, do you feel that these images depict peaceful gatherings:

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Look, they’re smiling, no one is actively getting hurt.  They don’t appear to be disturbing anyone.

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Just a nice boys’ club meeting out in the woods.  I’m sure no one’s quiet evening was disrupted.  I don’t see anyone lynched in the background.  I mean they’re wearing white after all.

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How about this guy?  He looks like a cuddly teddy bear type.  He’s not yelling or anything.  Just minding his own business holding up some light reading.

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Some “very fine people.”

 

There is a curse that comes with the blessing to “peacefully assemble.”  I hate to use the term peace there, because what it really means is that we can assemble as long as we are not actively physically hurting people, among a few other limitations.  In other words, this is not necessarily synonymous with “peace.”  It was lawful for a group of white supremacists to gather in a park in Charlottesville.  But please, don’t for a second call what they were doing before things got violently out of hand a “peaceful” gathering.

Everything depicted in each of these photographs, when looked at in the context of the actual situation, are inherently dangerous, vile, immoral, and completely lacking any semblance of peace.

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If you want some ideas on how to promote peace please see my recent posts on charity, particularly how to break down barriers.

Kindness and Charity- Part 3- Breaking Down the Barriers

/ srabbott2 / 3 Comments

Now that we’ve discussed the definitions of kindness and charity, and the barriers that get in the way, let’s get on with how to break those barriers down!

ASSUME PEOPLE ARE DOING THE BEST THEY CAN

I recently read Rising Strong by Brene Brown.  Amazing book, definitely encourage people to read it.  She tells a story about part of her personal journey with how she views people.  It was brought on when her therapist asked her if she thought people, in general, were doing the best they can.  Her response was no, no way people are doing the best they can.  So she began asking other people she encountered the same question and got varied responses.  As I was listening (because when I said I read it, I actually meant I listened to it, ain’t nobody got time for reading!) I thought about the people I’ve encountered that I knew there was no way they were doing the best they could, and myself, I know there are definitely times when I am not doing the best I can.  But then as her story continued she changed her mind, and so did I.  She recounted getting together with a friend and asking the question, knowing that the friend would agree with her about people NOT doing the best they can, which the friend did.  The friend then went on with a rant about breastfeeding and how people just are not doing the best they can and if they weren’t up for breastfeeding then they shouldn’t have even gotten pregnant, and if they really loved their kids they would give it their all.  This hit Brene really hard, and it hit me really hard as well.  Sounds like Brene and I had a very similarly unfortunate experience with breastfeeding and the judgment, whether direct or indirect, at failing at it.  My experience was difficult, I didn’t produce well, and baby didn’t latch well, and it hurt, it hurt so bad.  It made me go to a very dark place so with my first I started formula very early on, and blessedly was able to continue nursing part time with him.  But when people would say things like, oh- you just gotta_____, or keep trying it will come, it made me want to scream, “I’M DOING THE BEST I CAN!!!”  And for me that best was making sure he was fed and that primarily came from a bottle of formula.

Then I thought about other times in my life where looking from the outside it probably didn’t look like I was doing my best.  My second pregnancy was rough.  I was in debilitating pain from 10 weeks on, my energy level was non-existent, those things combined with the hormones put me in a pretty bad depression cycle.  My house was a horrible mess, and my son watched way more TV than I ever would have thought possible, and I was doing the absolute best I could in that moment.

Let’s think about others, now of course there are times when they are not doing their best, but put that aside for a minute.  You don’t know if they are battling debilitating physical pain, mental illness, a recent crisis, disease, addiction, the list could go on.  The lady that yelled on the phone, the student who didn’t get their homework done, the mom down the street that’s always drunk and letting her kids roam the streets- is it possible that they are actually doing the best they can in that moment?  Yes, it’s actually possible.

That doesn’t mean that we don’t help them or just let it slide.  In the case of a neighbor or someone in your life that is suffering from addiction or putting children in harm’s way, that doesn’t mean that you don’t make phone calls to appropriate resources at appropriate times.  That might be what they need to help them bring their best up to an appropriate level.  What it does mean is that you approach them differently, from a place of love and compassion rather than from a place of judgment and disdain.

SERVE AND BE SERVED

Serve

I have always loved doing service.  One of best friends and I started a club in Jr. High whose primary purpose was to support students in Nepal by paying their tuition for school.  The club is actually still around almost 2 decades later (that makes me feel really old).  To this day when I meet someone from Nepal I have this immediate love for them, which might freak them out, but serving them has made me feel connected to them across the globe.

More recently, as in last year as opposed to almost 20 years ago, I had the opportunity to serve a refugee family recently arrived from Syria.  I got connected with a group that arranged for meals to be brought in to families as they arrived.  There was not an apartment immediately available, so this family of 8 (the parents and 6 kids) were split between 2 motel rooms, they had limited finances, limited access to transportation, and their English was even more limited than everything else.  So I volunteered to bring them a meal.  They are Muslim so it needed to be Halal and it happened to be during Ramadan so it needed to be delivered after the sun went down.

This gave me the opportunity to do research on what Halal even meant (for those that don’t know, it’s similar to the Kosher laws that orthodox Jews follow), and to learn more about Islamic customs.

I’ll admit I was a little nervous to go and meet this family.  My only impression of Muslim men, especially coming from the Middle East, was unfortunately negative.  I pictured someone stern and oppressive, I thought I would need to keep my young son away and quiet as that would be the woman’s duty.  I assumed the wife would be quiet and afraid of her husband.  I had been programmed with a lot of misinformation, like I discussed in part 2.

My experience was so different from what I imagined.  The husband was incredibly welcoming, warm, and kind.  He did seem a little surprised when I put out my hand to shake his, but was not upset by the gesture.  He loved my son who was not quite 2 at the time.  He threw him in the air and tickled him.  He let him jump on the bed with their two young daughters.

Despite the very difficult language barriers (even with Google translate), we had a lovely visit with them.  They kept offering us food and drinks.  I kept refusing until I finally realized how much it would mean to them to serve us, to show some amount of hospitality as they would have done in their former life before war, oppression, and persecution took everything away from them.  We finally accepted a glass of coke and they were so happy to give it to us.  (Not being a regular caffeine drinker and being around 9 in the evening, I actually didn’t sleep at all that night- but it was totally worth it!)

That act of service, for a group of people I was so misinformed about, changed my heart.  It broadened my horizons.  It made me look at them as “brothers instead of others.”  It helped me develop charity.  It started me on a path with Lifting Hands International that has allowed me to continue serving in meaningful ways which lifts the hands of refugees but might lift my heart and my spirit even more.

I have found no better way to develop a bond with others besides selfless service.  Try it, in your community, in your family, in your workplace, and in your marriage.  Your love will grow for them as well as their love for you.  When I have served others that are going through a particularly trying time I feel invested in their trial and in their life.  We need to be more invested in the human family.

Be served

When I was the ripe old age of 20 I had an arch nemesis.  We’ll call her Jesse.  See at the time I had started dating a guy, we’ll call him, Jake.  We weren’t exclusive, but things were moving in a good direction, slowly, but I just thought that was sweet that he was a slow mover.  Jesse moved into our apartment complex the end of January and Jake met her briefly as he was friends with some of her room mates, nothing of consequence.  Valentines day was coming up and I was planning all sorts of cute things, like decorating his truck, baking cookies, and making a mushy card.  But the week leading up to Valentine’s day he became a little distant, and like I said nothing had been established that we were a couple so I got a weird vibe and decided to just give him a little Valentine like I was giving other friends.  I went to deliver it and Jesse was there with him, looking at his computer with him, but not just looking at something together, in the words of While You Were Sleeping, they were “leaning.”  I was a little rattled and confused and I think I spent the rest of the evening crying to my room mates.  Guys, less than a week later they were officially a couple and a week after that they were ENGAGED.  They had known each other less than a month and for two of those weeks he was dating me.

I didn’t like her and couldn’t take them seriously whatsoever. When word got around that her parents were not supportive of the wedding, I was like, gee whiz, can’t imagine why.  I avoided her like the plague and anytime she did come up I said her name like it was a dirty word.

Flash forward a few months, I was competing in an event called Dancesport at BYU (don’t get excited, I’m not a good dancer, but I was taking a social dance class and that allows you to compete with other people in the class).  Jesse actually was a good dancer, and was in some of the higher level competitions.  I ended up getting horribly ill the night before the event but was well enough in the morning to get there and dance in the first round.  A friend had driven me up there but I didn’t have a way home besides walking 2 miles which I was not looking forward to at all because I was sick and it was cold.  So who should happen to walk up at that time, Jesse.  I did not want to talk to her and I certainly did not want to accept any kind of help from her, part of me kind of hoped she was not heading home at that moment.  But she was, and she offered me a ride, and the practical side of me beat out the hateful side of me because I was really sick.

That moment, changed so much about my attitude.  Humbling myself enough to accept help from her, my arch nemesis, made me see her as a person and realized she actually was kinda cool.  We definitely didn’t become best friends, but I did stop saying her name like a dirty word and let go of the resentment I had been holding on to.  It allowed me to open my heart up and want good things for them, rather than sitting back and wishing the worst on them.  It allowed me to start developing charity for them.

Accepting help can be hard.  We’re stubborn and prideful, and there definitely is merit to being self sufficient and independent.  But what I said above about feeling invested in the human family, it goes both ways.

In the LDS faith, we believe that when we are baptized we make covenants, or promises, with God, one of them being that we will “bear one another’s burdens, mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort.”  We like to focus on bearing the burden and giving the comfort, but sometimes we are the ones that have a burden, are mourning, or needing comfort.  It’s great to be the one serving, but sometimes you need to be the one being served.  You need to allow others the opportunity to be invested in your life, allow them the opportunity to keep their covenants.  Don’t be selfish and keep all the warm fuzzy feelings that come from helping someone to yourself.  Yes, be self reliant, but also reach out for help when it is needed, it might just help you develop greater charity for others, and let them develop greater charity towards you AND others while they’re at it.

DO SOMETHING!

You can’t do everything, you can’t single handedly solve all the problems, and make everyone just get a long.  But you can do SOMETHING.

When Christ told us to clothe the naked, feed the hungry, etc., he didn’t prescribe exactly how it had to be done.  It could include literally handing someone clothing or food. Have you ever given a homeless person a pair of socks?  I cleaned out my husband’s sock drawer and handed clean socks to pan handlers on the street, I got some of the most sincerely grateful looks and smiles I have ever been given.  It could also include giving what you can (money, time, goods) to charitable organizations.  Don’t have the extra room in the finances, socks in the drawer, or time in the day?  A smile and a kind word can go a long way to changing the hearts of everyone involved.

Do something to learn: have a conversation, pick up a book, or at the very least use the Google machine to get more information (from unbiased sources).  You don’t have to become an expert, but the more you learn about other groups the more you will love them.  Knowledge is power!

If all else fails, if you can’t say something nice, don’t say nuthin at all!  Think before you speak or share.  Ask yourself if your motivation is love, will it spread love, and will it help others feel loved.

Realize that charity and kindness are action words.  It is not enough to sit back and not do hateful things (although by all means if this is the first step you need to take, please sit back and stop doing or saying hateful things).  You must ACT, you must do something.

Bringing this full circle, back to post 1, where we defined charity as the pure love of Christ.  Christ did not become the embodiment of charity by sitting back and saying he loved us.  He developed charity by constantly acting out of love, and ultimately sacrificing his life because of his love for us.  If we are to develop anything remotely close to that level of love, we need to look around us and just start by doing something.

What will you do today to break down the barriers?

Kindness and Charity- Part 2- Barriers

/ srabbott2 / 1 Comment

In part one I discussed background and definitions for kindness and charity.  If you didn’t read that one, first off you should, but if you’re still not convinced to click and give it a quick perusal, essentially charity is a deep and powerful love for mankind.  The kind of love that would motivate you to do anything to help another person.  Kindness is how we express our feelings of charity.

This post will deal primarily with some of the barriers I feel that many of us face that either prevent us from developing or diminish our feelings of charity.  Part 3 will share some ways to break down the barriers.

As I talk about some of these barriers you might realize that you’ve done some of these things.  My intention is not to call out anyone individually as these are things I have observed generally and in many cases struggle with as well.  So please don’t feel like I think you’re a bad person if you struggle with these barriers, just take the opportunity to look introspectively and consider if there might be some ways you could improve.  (The correct answer is that all of us can improve in all of these areas!).

With out much further ado (although I do enjoy further ado), the barriers:

ASSUMING SINISTER MOTIVES

We all do this from time to time, sometimes in very simple ways.  We assume that someone did something specifically to bother us, or that they are a jerk, etc.  But I see this most often in regards to political positions.  We assume that the other side of the issue is evil, lazy, hateful, and in general the spawn of Satan.

Let me give an example.  Trigger warning, controversial subject about to be discussed!

Welfare.

Chances are a lot of you just got in the mood to be defensive about your position and why the other side is wrong, and evil, etc.  I see this all the time.  A person with conservative leanings expresses an opinion that contradicts the current welfare system.  Immediately it is assumed that they HATE poor people!  They don’t understand what it’s like.  Etc. Etc. Etc.

On the flip side someone says something in favor of the current welfare system and the other side assumes they’re just lazy, they aren’t even trying, etc. etc. etc.

Stop!  Take a step back.  Don’t assume sinister motives.

So I fall in the camp of having concerns with the way the welfare system is run currently.  If you accuse me of hating poor people I might smack you (except that wouldn’t be very charitable so I won’t!).  It’s quite the opposite actually.  I don’t say this to toot my own horn, or do my alms before men, but you should know before you accuse me of hating poor people that my family donates a decent portion of our income to the poor, I regularly hand food or water bottles to pan handlers on the street, I recently helped in a service project to make “plarn” (plastic yarn) that gets crocheted into sleeping mats for the homeless, and last week I took dinner to a refugee family arriving from Cuba.  I spent a good amount of time on my mission serving and teaching people in the ghetto and spent my first year and a half of teaching in a Title I school.  So yep, you got me, the reason I disagree with how the welfare system is run because I HATE poor people.  Quite the opposite actually, I have qualms with it because I love the people being served by these programs but have unfortunately witnessed generational problems and even oppression that are the unintended consequences of the system and simply feel that there might be a better way to serve them.

Are there people that disagree with welfare that can be hateful and need a charity check? Oh most definitely.

Flip side.  As I mentioned above I have had the opportunity to associate with a lot of people with financial struggles.  By and large they are not lazy.  They are trying their best.  They need help.  And those that I know that support the welfare system in its current state simply want to help them.

Are there some that are lazy or wasteful?  Uh, yeah, a few.

Now we could argue and debate until we’re blue in the face about the merits of both sides.  But that’s not my point here.  My point is that when we stop assuming the other side has sinister motives and instead attempt to understand their position and feel charity, maybe just maybe, we could have a civil discourse and actually kindly solve some problems.

But also, do take a look at your motivation for your positions, and ask yourself, “What if love [was my] only motive?”

 

VIEWING PEOPLE AS “OTHERS” INSTEAD OF AS “BROTHERS”

Another barrier to charity that I see is that we label people in other groups instead of viewing them as human beings, children of God- literally our brothers and sisters in the human family.  It’s easy to speak disdainfully of groups: Democrats, Republicans, Christians, Jews, Muslims, Atheists, Whites, Blacks, Mexicans, Illegals, Gays, Pro-lifers, Pro-choicers, Feminists, the Wealthy, the Poor, the “others”.  When we view people as “others” instead of “brothers” we have a tendency to dehumanize them, we say things about groups that we probably wouldn’t say about individuals.  We make assumptions, pass judgment, and turn them into the enemy.  We start to hate them.  But we don’t really know who “they” are.

They are individuals, complex human beings, our brothers and sisters.

Here’s another pretty controversial topic to illustrate this point:

Police brutality, the BLM movement, etc.

People have been killed by police officers.  I’ve seen a lot of lies, damn lies, and statistics about the numbers.  Some people throw out the argument that it’s being blown out of proportion because more white people are actually killed each year than black people, but then there are fewer black people than white people in America so what’s the actual percentage.  And we go around and we fight and we lay blame on the “others.”  It’s their fault!  Insert whichever antecedent for “their” that you want.

What if when one of these horribly unfortunate stories comes up on the news we stopped for a moment and grieved for our brothers.  A human life was lost, and whatever circumstances lead up to it, that’s sad, and we ought to mourn for our brothers, the one that we lost and the ones closely involved that will now go through the grieving process of the one lost.  After we’ve taken a moment to mourn, then we can calmly begin to discuss what everyone as part of the human family can do to prevent future tragedies whether that’s police training, body cameras, better outreach programs in struggling neighborhoods, better education, or whatever other ideas can be thought of.  Then when someone has a different idea than you do, see above, don’t assume sinister motives, try looking at them as your brother.

I have 2 biological brothers.  Do we agree on everything?  Heavens no!  Do they drive me crazy sometimes?  Most definitely!  Sometimes I tell them things straight up when I think they’ve made a less awesome decision, and things are definitely more peaceful when we don’t live under the same roof.  But they’re my brothers, and I love them.  I hurt when they hurt, I feel joy in their accomplishments, I worry for them, I cheer them on and support them.  And all of that comes ahead of any disagreements on lifestyle choices, political views, religious convictions, or plain brotherly annoyance.

If we could start looking at “others” as our “brothers,” maybe we could love them despite the differences, we could stop entrenching against each other, and we could start working together.  We could develop feelings of charity and show them kindness.

 

MISUNDERSTANDINGS AND THE RESULTING FEAR

There’s an unfortunate amount of misinformation, fake news, and outright lies that are generated and perpetuated (much faster thanks to the invention of something we like to call the “interwebs”).  One of my favorite examples of the perpetuation of ridiculous information is that my grandfather, while serving an LDS mission in the late 1940’s in the central United States, was approached by a stranger and asked if they could see the scars on his head from where his horns were removed.  This person had been told that all Mormons were born with horns.  For the record, we are not born with horns, we are just normal people, ok maybe normal is a stretch, but we are in fact human beings lacking in the horn department.

But imagine for a moment the fear that could result from this misinformation.  There is a natural trepidation that comes with the unknown, but if you add on top of it frightening misinformation about the unknown that will result in outright fear.  If I thought someone was walking around that might have horns I might become overly defensive which at the least could lead to blocking out otherwise nice people, or worst case scenario, in many cases this type of unfounded fear from misinformation has lead to violence.

On a much more serious note, the spreading of misinformation and outright lies about the Jews is what allowed a nation, which I’m sure for the most part was actually full of very wonderful and loving people, to commit, support, or at least stand by and allow the atrocities performed during the Holocaust.  It took some very evil people in power, with some evil henchmen, to convince a lot of neutral people to be afraid, and next thing you know, they aren’t so neutral.

This problem was not isolated to the early 1900s.  In fact, in some ways it might be getting worse because of the internet.  Fear mongering as click bait runs rampant.  Fake news, or at least assumptions without facts are made constantly (and you know what they say about assume).

I see this most often currently in regards to Muslims.  The picture that has been painted of Muslims for Americans for years has been very negative and in most respects completely wrong.  Do they have customs, traditions, and beliefs that differ greatly from most common American customs, traditions, and beliefs? Yes.  Has there been oppression of women in certain areas?  Yes.  Are there some extremists that have done and continue to do some very evil things with the guise of being for Islam?  Yes- but they are few and far between.

I recently read I Am Malala about a teenage girl from Pakistan who was an activist for education and was shot in the head by the Taliban.  The book is wonderful, I learned so much from it, but my biggest take away wasn’t something that was explicitly discussed in the book.

I feel like the general public views Muslims as a little more cohesive than they actually are.  If you consider Judaism, there are several sects that follow “the Law” with varying degrees of orthodoxy from those that live in small communes and keep kosher exactly, to groups that live their daily lives in a similar manner to the mainstream but still hold to traditions and holidays.  The rabbis may bicker among themselves what is correct, but they are all Jews.  Same with Christians.  There are so many different sects of Christianity, following the same basic core beliefs, and yet practicing it and interpreting it so many different ways.  There are some groups that follow a very rigid set of laws, and others that take a more “anything goes” approach as long as you accept Jesus.  While the groups bicker and sometimes try to define other groups out of Christianity, they are all Christians.

But Muslims, without knowing much about what they believe, I fear that the picture most Americans have in their head is that all women are forced to wear burkas and can’t leave their house alone, and all men are blood thirsty jihadists.  That is so far from being the truth.  Within Islam there are also many groups with varied approaches to how they practice.  Malala, and particularly her father, are very devout in their faith, and yet less traditional than the picture that has been painted in the minds of most Americans.

It made me begin to realize that many people are judging all Muslims off of misinformation and the fear of a small group of extremists.  I would prefer not to be judged as a Christian off of the actions of the Westboro Baptists, so don’t judge Muslims, who are by and large very peaceful, off of the actions of an extremist group.

The moral of the story- learn and research from credible sources before you jump to fear as your conclusion.  Think and fact check before sharing something that might contain misinformation.  Don’t let misinformation and the resulting fear allow you to stand back and allow atrocities to happen to others.

Don’t let barriers get in the way of developing charity and demonstrating kindness for ALL of God’s children.

_________

Coming soon- Part 3- Breaking Down the Barriers

 

 

Kindness and Charity- Part 1- Definitions

/ srabbott2 / 6 Comments

I have the wonderful opportunity of being a teacher for the Relief Society in my ward (that’s the women’s group in our congregation if you are not familiar with LDS lingo).  I love preparing lessons and presenting them to the women and would like to share these thoughts with a bigger audience.  I’m creating a category for my lessons.  While these obviously are written primarily with an LDS audience in mind, I will do my best to make the points as generally accessible and understood as possible.  They will also go much more in depth than what I present on Sundays.

The lessons I teach come from recent General Conference addresses.  Our local leadership selects the talks that they feel are most important for us to focus on at a local level.  A few months ago they selected Kindness, Charity, and Love by President Thomas S. Monson.

We believe that President Monson is a latter-day prophet.  Essentially the same as Noah or Moses in ancient times.  We believe that God has chosen him to be his mouthpiece to the world.  If you have read this specific message you will notice that it is rather short, I printed it out and it fit on one page.  These addresses are typically longer, but as President Monson is growing old his physical stamina to deliver an extended message is waning.  To me, that means, that anything he is using his limited energy to say must be pretty important for us to pay attention to and apply in our lives.

President Monson begins by quoting from the Book of Mormon Moroni 7:44-47:

“And if a man be meek and lowly in heart, and confesses by the power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ, he must needs have charity; for if he have not charity he is nothing; wherefore he must needs have charity.

“And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked. …

“Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail—

“But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.”

I love these thoughts on charity.  First that without it we are NOTHING.  It doesn’t matter what else we aspire to or attain in this life, if we don’t develop charity, and if the things we attain aren’t products of our charity, then we have accomplished nothing.

Now consider that charity never fails and that it is the pure love of Christ.  What exactly does the “pure love of Christ” mean?  For those that come from a non-Christian background, please don’t feel like I’m forcing Jesus on you, but for the purposes of understanding how I define this word, consider the following.

We believe that Christ led a perfect life, that he was completely without sin or mistakes.  At the end of his life we believe that he chose to die for all of us so that we could overcome our sins and mistakes.  This entailed him feeling all of our guilt.

My little boy is 3 and starting to understand when he does something wrong or hurts somebody (sometimes at least).  Recently he was playing at the children’s museum and ran straight into a girl and knocked her down and made her cry.  I yelled out, “Be careful!” right as I saw the collision about to occur.  She was not hurt badly, probably more shocked than anything, but she cried and ran to her mom.  My little guy came to me trying to hold back tears feeling bad that he had hurt her.  His poor little face was so sad because he’s still so innocent but felt the guilt of his actions.  So imagine someone that has been completely innocent their whole life suddenly feeling EVERYONE’S guilt.  And not just the little things like accidentally running into someone, the bad and ugly decisions of our lives, he suddenly felt them.  And then it didn’t stop there.  We learn in Alma 7:11-12 that he also took on ALL of our pain, afflictions, temptations, sicknesses, and infirmities.  We talk about walking a mile in someone’s shoes.  He walked more than a mile, he walked it all so he can truly love us.  He knows our pain perfectly and therefore can love us perfectly.  And then it didn’t stop there.  He then allowed himself to be mocked, and whipped, and spat upon, falsely accused, and finally killed in the gruesome manner of crucifixion.  He could have stopped it at anytime, but he chose to continue so he could overcome death for us.  But, how, how could anyone do that.  The answer is that charity never fails.  If he had done it with any other motive than love he would not have been able to endure it all.

That’s what I mean then when I refer to charity, or the pure love of Christ, it’s love strong enough, tested enough, and understanding enough to be willing to sacrifice everything for others no matter what, no strings attached.  It’s a feeling of love deep down inside us that must become a guiding force in our lives.

Once we can begin to develop that feeling for others, it manifests itself through our actions in kindness.  President Monson quotes another apostle and his dear friend Elder Joseph B Wirthlin:

“Kindness is the essence of a celestial life. Kindness is how a Christlike person treats others. Kindness should permeate all of our words and actions at work, at school, at church, and especially in our homes.

“Jesus, our Savior, was the epitome of kindness and compassion.”

The scriptures are full of stories and examples of the kindness our Savior expressed to others from large things like weeping with his sisters and then raising Lazarus from the dead, showing compassion to the woman taken in adultery, to smaller acts like turning water into wine for the marriage feast.  He went about doing good and being kind to everyone, regardless of their status, culture, or lifestyle, and no matter how complex or simple the need.  We may not be able to solve every problem as miraculously as he did, but no matter what we CAN be kind.

_________

Stay tuned- next post will deal with barriers we face that prevent us from feeling charity and expressing kindness